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Feb. 23rd, 2008 @ 03:17 am Looking North
Sometimes I wonder how people do it. Just pick up and move. It seems all the unsurities and necessaties of doing so would bog down most. Maybe just me.

I could move to the town of my dreams right now. I use move in the loosest sense of the word. Currently I have no job there, no place to live, no place to crash. I have a place to shower, through a gym membership, and I suppose with a car and sleeping bag I don't need much more, but that raises the question of my stuff.

I fucking hate my stuff in the same way that I love it. It makes my settled life much more comfortable but it requires that I settle to make it so. I know the unsettledness would make it worthless but once I got there I would miss the stuff I gave up. I know, I know transcend worldly possessions and all that, but dammit, I imagine life as very boring without my books and dvds and whatnot. Maybe I just need to downsize.

A year and a half ago my 'stuff' fit into the trunk of my car. How did I let things get so out of hand? How did I accumulate a 15x10 storage unit worth of stuff in my year on the island? I can answer that myself but it only leads to me being a giant pushover and saying 'sure'. Not that I'm complaining, my next place is going to be the shit, when/whereever that may be.

I've thought about trying to sell/give my stuff away, but when I broke it down the stuff either A) wasn't really mine, I was just holding it for the time being or B)wouldn't be worth a damn to anyone aside from me anyway.

Boxes of books I can't bear to part with. An entire wall when it was last unloaded. An ever expanding DVD collection I really want to watch over again... someday. Clothes I haven't worn since highschool that I know if I continue on my healthier kick I'll be able to wear again. Kitchen shit I know I'd miss next time I have occasion to cook for my friends. Multiple mattresses.... those I can get rid of. I only need the one, right?

It's time to take inventory and cut the crap. Time to ascend beyond my sentimentalist packrat ways. Time to grow the fuck up.
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Sep. 27th, 2007 @ 09:51 am Coming Back
I'll be in Oly tonight for drinking at the Eastside. It's thursday, I'm thirsty. Join me and we'll get our good times on.
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Aug. 15th, 2007 @ 01:14 pm Merry Clutchmas, Everyone!
Current Location: Waiting around before the Clutch show
Current Mood: anxious
Current Music: Father Clutchmas
So I'm going to a real show for the first time in almost 6 years. I think the last time was my senior year of highschool out at the gorge. It would be an understatement to say I'm stoked.

I'm also creeping ever closer to escaping the island I once loved and the memories wrapped up in it. I suppose I still like the PLACE but people and events there have a left a sour taste in my mouth, which is too bad, because it's not a bad place. I wish I didn't have this half-step in between being there and being in my new home, but I need to do it right this time. I need to step firmly into my new town with my own two feet.

In addition to that I have a couch lamprey staying with me right now. It may sound a little hypocritical, me bitching about a couch surfer, but I'm kinda past that now. At one point in my life I was oblivious to the obvious strain having an additional mouth to feed, to having someone in yur space all the time. And you know, it's not even that he's there, it's just how oblivious he is to the messes he makes and the strain. I'm going to have to clean the fuck out of my apartment when he's gone. Oh well, I have no right to complain, I haven't said a damned thing to him yet.

Anyhoo, the anticipation is killing me. Both the move and the show. newness all around. I just wish I had the cash for a few drinks before I was slaughtered by wailing guitars and pounding drums.
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Jul. 8th, 2007 @ 10:05 am (no subject)
There something about a new town that reminds me of the old town that drew me in. Way, way deep. I've decided where to plant my flag. Way, way up.

Bellingham, it's everything I wished Olympia could have been, and much much more. I don't feel the weird intensity that permeated olympia. People will have a conversation with you on the street, invite you into their house where they have packs of dogs and instruments to play with.

I fell in love with it almost immediatly.

And I have a friend who needs just that.

Opporunities of all kinds exists there for me. I've been stuck in a rut for too long. I'm going to do this, and then find a new this.

That is all there is.
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Jun. 26th, 2007 @ 11:42 am Shifting Gears
Current Location: In My Head
Current Mood: working
Current Music: Stupid Internet Radio Day Of Silence...
There's so much I want to do I don't even know where to begin. It feels a little weird to be full of dreams that have nothing to do with what my life has been for the last few years, to want to just go ahead and put life on hold for the sake of graner adventures.

I want to head East to India with a camera and my filmmaker friend, get on some motorcycles and ride around making the movie I'd see in my head every night.

I want to head north to alaska, get on a crab boat and beat the hell out of myself for 4 months making enough money to live comfortably for a year.

I want to move to a city where no one knows my name, knows who I am, and carve myself a new life. Well, on second thought, maybe a city where I have one or two friends to make the transition a little easier.

I want to sell my car and become a devoted bike rider. I mean really trick out a bike.

I want to go into a bar or really any other social gathering space and have the confidence in myself to just go up to girls and shamelessly flirt. I mean, seriously, I'm a pretty good catch.

I want to do all these things and more. I can do all these things and more. The world is my oyster, I just need to pick up the knife and shuck that bitch.

Fun Fun Fun.
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May. 30th, 2007 @ 10:36 am (no subject)
I was feeling this incredible sense of urgency in everything this morning. I felt stuck in a rut that I couldn't quite figure out how to pop myself out of. I wanted to run, leave it all behind, set up shop in another part of the country away from everything. And then I read my horoscope. I'm not one to put much stock in them, they're fun to read though.

Anyway, it was one line long and it put everything to rest. I read one line and my heart slowed down and my head stopped spinning and the anxiety died down. I'm on the right path now, I just need to keep plugging. It will get worse before it gets better, but it will get better. Patience pays off, it just takes a bit longer.
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May. 4th, 2007 @ 09:10 am (no subject)
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Apr. 8th, 2007 @ 11:09 am thats two dozen.
Current Location: Work
Current Mood: working
Current Music: the custodian's vacuum
AS of about 11pm tonight I'll have officially been on this rock for 24 years. To think what that means, to think about what I've done, what I haven't what I will, and what I won't, bottles the mind. I had a sweet-ass barbeque over the weekend, successfully testing the capacity of not only my apartment but also my liver.

I have wonderful friends.

I also still have a shit-ton of hooch in my house.

I've been talking alot with my friend eli lately. He is a world traveller... actually, he circumnavigated over the last year and a half. Lately I'd been feeling stuck and stagnate but takling with someone who just finished an AMAZING travel experience like that has gotten me fired up about seeing some of what this life has to offer in different climes.

My sense of adventure increases with every conversation, it's almost impossible to stay here now.
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Mar. 25th, 2007 @ 11:14 am Bob's Birthday BBQ
Current Location: WORK
Current Mood: working
Current Music: Cake - Satan is My Motor
I'll be having a Barbeque on April 6th celebrating my 24th birthday. All are invited. It'll be up at my place on Bainbridge Island so if you need directions let me know. There will be meat, booze and the other essential food groups. I think they're candy and exhaust fumes but I can't make any garuntees to the last two. Hit me up if you need my new number or directions or what-have-you.
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Mar. 4th, 2007 @ 11:44 am guilty pleasures
http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/local/306047_seabollywood04.html?source=rss

When and where, when and where?
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Feb. 25th, 2007 @ 11:59 am (no subject)
I'm pretty sure this job is killing me.
Not physically but every day I wake up I feel less and less of me and more and more dead.
It doesn't really make me happy to be nice to these people, in fact it keeps less of my nice around for the people who really need it.
It makes me jealous and resentful of people who have a job that doesn't take them 2 hours away from home, who can go on vacations, who can think of tomorrow as not just another trudge towards somewhere I don't really want to be... ever.

Maybe I'm just lonely. Maybe I'm too stupid to realize that this is the american dream. Pounding it out day after day so you can squeek by and some asshole in an office can afford his nice things.

Maybe I just need to medicate again. A flick and a puff and away I go.
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Jan. 28th, 2007 @ 09:56 am The Fun Machine Took a Shit and Died
Current Location: WORK, Aubeta Networks, Seattle, WA
Current Mood: bored
Current Music: Raised By Horses - Clutch
So I blew my head gasket(well my car's head gasket) the other day. It's not too bad though, I take the ferry/bus combo to work anyway and the island isn't all that big. It just means I have to plan things out a bit farther ahead for a little bit. I've also got my back-up car being fixed up. Hopefully it'll be done by this weekend.

I'm trying to stay positive. Life is good for the most part, I live close to some really awesome people on a really awesome island. I've got friends who love me and I love them. I've got a job that may not be fulfilling but at least it pays the bills until something better comes along. I've got a sweet place to live with the most awesome neighbor and landlady living below me. My life is on a general upswing, I'm getting "in shape"(well in a bit slimmer shape anyway, I already am a shape now), I've got a sweet guitar that I'm going to sell to get out of debt(it's a little bitter-sweet).

And when it comes down to it, I've got a roof over my head and food to put into my belly so yeah, fuck the Fun Machine, fuck it right in the ass.
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Jan. 10th, 2007 @ 08:54 am (no subject)
I just read the most wonderful horroscope on Yahoo.com.

"Take an extra moment to remind yourself that you have a wonderful life"

The crazy thing? I do and I did.
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Dec. 24th, 2006 @ 07:41 am straight jacked.
Visit lustsign.com to learn your Lustsign!
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Dec. 6th, 2006 @ 10:25 am (no subject)
COMBAT CARDS 2.1
watch bahbrahb fight
CREATE YOUR CARD
what should i read next
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Nov. 26th, 2006 @ 02:34 pm (no subject)


Biomechanical Artificial Humanoid Built for Rational Assassination and Hazardous Battle

Get Your Cyborg Name





Beguiling Amorous Hunk Bestowing Recreation and Arousing, Hot Backrubs

Get Your Sexy Name

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Nov. 26th, 2006 @ 10:53 am Why Toronto Rocks or, the best little apartment building in Canada
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20061125/od_nm/marijiuana_dc
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Oct. 15th, 2006 @ 01:41 am (no subject)
So, I moved in with some friends on an island.

Few things could make me happier so I think I'll just let the waves lap at my shores and bask in bliss.

Good times.
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Jun. 27th, 2006 @ 01:50 am (no subject)

I died in the Dungeon of Bahbrahb

I was killed in a fire-ravaged hall by Maple Leaf Guy the kobold, whilst carrying...

the Armour of Partying, the Sword of Woodcarving, the Sceptre of Reading, the Wand of Macho Man Randy Savage, the Armour of Mistresskor, the Dagger of Borrowed Halo, the Armour of Sleep, the Axe of Japanese Literature, the Axe of Literature, a Figurine of Liger Skills and 70 gold pieces.

Score: 72

Explore the Dungeon of Bahbrahb and try to beat this score,
or enter your username to generate and explore your own dungeon...
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Jun. 24th, 2006 @ 03:20 am Rumors
Current Location: Tacoma, WA
Current Mood: bored
Current Music: Radio musics!
So apparently some people think I'm still away(partially due to my procrastination on changing my voicemail message) and some think I'm in town.

Neither is true, I'm back but living in Tacoma. I work in Oly right now but that may change soon, as could my living situation. Ah, the chaos and freedom of my post-graduate work. That's exactly what it is, freedom. It's responsibility without obligation. Before I had obligation without responsibility. I think I'm happier now. I can just work and do my thing and I don't have to cater to anything as long as I do those things that I feel I need to do(and let's not forget those grabby bill collectors).

Everyone is already starting to drift. I miss many already and don't know where some are headed.

I want to know.
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